Valentine, The Quintessential Vampire

Unsurprisingly, this is a scarcely known Nosferatu satire about a love sick vampire named Valentine (pronounced “Val’n-teen”),  who runs an all-night florist shop in Manchester’s Northern Quarter. We follow his escapades around dating and falling in love with a mortal girl who walked into his shop one night following a pitiful break-up with her now ex boyfriend over the phone. The biggest problem that Valentine has to overcome with dating a mortal is his sister (with whom he shares a flat) and their parents who turn up for an impromptu visit. This was Sale Nomads choice of presentation to coincide with Halloween fever which is, at first glance, a fun and experimental choice with all the nods to vampy traits which anyone who’s familiar with Bram Stoker or the Twilight flicks would recognise. 

The plot itself is about as tenuous as one can. The writing prowess would struggle to score above average on a beginners creative writing course – at first I assumed this play had been penned by someone within the society who'd perhaps expressed an interest at having a go at script writing. During the first half I was giving the society credit for having a stab at a relatively unique project and for giving someone the opportunity to write an original piece which seemed to showcase the writers research and knowledge on vampire culture but, to be honest, not much more than that. After a quick Google search during the interval I was surprised (and slightly alarmed) to learn that this was in fact a licenced piece! Perhaps there were moments of overwhelming paraphrasing during this performance - which would itself be a discredit to any writer - and if so, I’d gladly take back the aforementioned comments but if not, then I’m sorry to report that the script resembled an improvised school drama project, lacking magnitude and scope. Without a shadow of a doubt and with all due respect, the society could have saved a few hundred quid here and written something more gripping and extensive themselves!

The design of the presentation was minimal yet effective with the prominent and rather beautiful flower wall as a backdrop which provided a striking image. The lack of space and sometimes awkward intimacy between the players of the performance area was compensated with appropriately humorous visual comedy, such as unnaturally springing up from behind a counter on cue as there was no other way to enter, all added to the parody and tomfoolery nature. Director, Richard Ross, had done about all he could do to make the piece vaguely substantial. 

As the hopeless romantic, Jay Hollows appropriately apologetic body language and softly spoken tone helped with the likability factor for the central character, Valentine. If performed in a larger auditorium he probably wouldn’t have carried past the fifth row of the stalls so an interpretation to wholly suit this studio space had been crafted.  

His vivacious and devious sister Natalia was injected with the appropriate venom and sassy humour by Sandie Cowle, excellently savoured she made the best of what little the script had given her prompting the biggest intended cackles of the performance. 

Angela Kate Cooke proffers us with her interpretation of the girlfriend, Hayley. The director’s notes in the programme describe her as “bubbly” though that’s not really what we got. Hayley was portrayed as a petulant vexing individual we’d hope our central character would run a mile from. This is not something I’m entirely blaming Angela for, the script is the script but a sweeter and wholesome interpretation (by all means with an edge) would have helped make the character more appealing and ultimately easier to like and care about. 

Grainne Wiggan and Stuart Harding made the most of their turns as the parents Vincent and Marianne and it’s their appearance that reveals something somewhat exciting, a twist! Stuart put in a virtuous parody of the more traditional, reminiscent of Christopher Lee’s, Dracula portrayal with the ideal ‘look’ - spoofed up perfectly. Grainne was less ‘spooky’, more tender and 'real' which was a nice contrast to compliment the twist for us to feel something for her, which we did. 

I don’t think we need to wonder why this piece isn’t seen more frequently. The cast and production team were evidently committed to the project with investment put into areas which rival other club house presentations, wholly commendable and favourable. Fun was evidently had with the piece and ideas were introduced to contribute affluence and offer an experience for those on stage and in the audience.  Praise is due here as it’s rare a society takes a punt at trying something out of the box and further praise is due for giving the piece as much zeal, faith and devotion as you did. 

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