Dad's Army

How appropriate that during the 80th Anniversary VE celebrations, SKAMP have opted to feature a production of the classic well-loved sit com ‘Dad’s Army.’   Based on a script written by Jimmy Perry and David Croft, the play itself features the episode titled ‘Deadly Attachment’ and this has been combined with a performance of the ‘Floral Dance’ (a sketch featured on the Royal Variety Performance in 1975) and various 1940s songs performed by the cast. 

From the moment we entered the room, we were transported back to the 1940s with patriotic bunting and themed tables. Ours had a battered enamel bowl and a vintage whiskey bottle, plus some flags to wave during the audience participation sing song.

Before the show, I was delighted to meet the Chairperson Alison Kirby and Director Tracy Hulme, who informed me that one of the cast members had had an accident during the previous night’s show and therefore some adaptations had been made.  

The curtains opened to the well-known theme of ‘Who Do You Think You are Kidding Mister Hitler?’ and the cast marched on stage to form a line.  The well-loved characters were immediately apparent: Private Pike (William Hulme) wearing his thick striped woolly scarf, Private Godfrey (Mick Cockerill) with his medical armband and first aid kit, Private Walker (Paul Butcher) ‘the spiv’ with his thin moustache, laid back attitude and concealed cigarette, the dour Scottish Private Fraser (Alex Moores), Sergeant Wilson (Andrew Tiplady) the upper middle class, gently spoken second in command, and Lance Corporal Jones (Phil Briston) barking out orders at the bemused platoon.

There is also the pompous Captain Mainwaring himself (Bill Lawrence), in full uniform, sitting in a wheelchair.   Pike steps forward and innocently asks Mainwaring why he was in a wheelchair.  Mainwaring tells him had been having tango lessons with his wife!   From that moment it was hardly noticeable that one character was having to negotiate the set in a wheelchair as the rest of the cast worked seamlessly around him.

The Home Guard have never actually had any direct dealings with Germans, but on this occasion their luck has changed.  Following a phone call from Colonel Pritchard (a dual role for David Weldrake who also plays the pompous Warden Hodges) the men are instructed to pick up a captured U-Boat Captain and his crew.  Meanwhile, Sergeant Wilson and Private Pike, have been given orders to put live detonators in a box of grenades, but Wilson thinks that is ‘awfully dangerous’ and puts dummy rounds in instead.

Jones is beyond himself with excitement, clutching his gun while barking orders in cod German, much to the bemusement of the U-boat Captain who speaks perfect English.  A wonderful performance from Adrian Worgan as the U-boat Captain, full of disdain and utter disbelief at the incompetence surrounding him as he makes derisory notes in his little black book.   Indeed, much of the humour is conveyed with the petty taunting and arguing, Germans versus the British, in an almost schoolboy gainsaying over the other.  In a hilarious scene, Mainwaring and the U-Boat Captain have a battle of wills over who would win the war resulting in Pike mockingly singing a song insulting Hitler.  Next, follows the most iconic scene from the TV series.  The U-Boat Captain asks Pike for his name to put in his book, and Captain Mainwaring shouts pompously, ‘Don’t tell him Pike!’  

Unfortunately, there has been a delay in the planned escort for the German prisoners, so they will have to be accommodated at the Home Guard’s Head Quarters, including providing them with a traditional delicacy of British fish and chips.   Another hilarious scene features Private Walker asking the U-Boat Captain for his fish and chips order, which the German sees as another chance to show his superiority over the British, by asking for ‘plaice’ and denigrating their ‘nasty soggy chips.’  I also loved the U-Boat Captain asking his bemused crew (featuring Lydia Henderson, Becki Oliver and Sarah Owen) in German who wanted vinegar and salt resulting in a zealous show of hands. 

Other characters appear.  The over-zealous ARP Warden Hodges and the Verger (Jason Wilson) who have very little faith in the Home Guard, particularly Mainwaring, and when they find out about the captured U-Boat Captain, are understandably anxious at the danger they have been put in, with the Verger saying, ‘The Vicar will be furious’.  The kindly Verger is also concerned about the treatment of the German prisoners.

Obviously, things don’t go according to plan.  The U-Boat Captain fakes an illness and takes advantage of a row between Mainwaring and Hodges, resulting in Hodges being held at gun point in the office effectively turning the tables on our hapless heroes.  To aid his escape, he will also use Jones as a human bomb by placing a live grenade down his trousers attached to a string, prompting Mainwaring to call him an ‘unspeakable swine.’  So, the scene is set as the nervous men escort a haughty U-Boat Captain and his crew to France, only to be intercepted by Colonel Pritchard who, in true British Army style, berates Jones on his shoddy uniform and pulls the string!

Obviously, Jones doesn’t explode, and it is Wilson who has saved the day by disobeying Mainwaring’s order regarding arming the grenades, which Mainwaring reluctantly must agree with. 

The men then show off their singing skills with some traditional war time songs, ‘Run Rabbit’ from Privates Godfrey and Fraser accompanied by pianist Liz Hill and, from the ‘Home Guard Song Book,’ a song sung by Mainwaring, Wilson and Jones.

There were some very good performances from all, with each cast member fully inhabiting their character, including Phil Briston as Lance Corporal Jones finally getting a chance to deal with real life Germans, shouting ‘handes down’ while poking at them with his rifle.  Also Paul Butcher as Private Walker, casually enquiring about fish and chip orders and never wanting to miss out on a business deal, offering to do a deal with the Germans.  

I was especially impressed with Pike (fifteen-year-old William Hulme) who created a very believable character incorporating all his wide-eyed innocence and eagerness. His delight at having to handle the huge Tommy Gun was wonderful and his obvious glee singing his song about the Fuhrer.

 Bill Lawrence was outstanding as Captain Mainwaring, his voice and mannerisms so reminiscent of the late Arthur Lowe in their delivery.  His performance was just the right side of caricature commanding the stage with authority.  He delivered his signature line ‘stupid boy’ with real exasperated relish.  The best scenes were his sparring with Adrian Worgan’s excellent U-Boat Captain like two school bullies at loggerheads each trying to gain the upper hand.  

The second half was a short sketch featuring the boys rehearsing a rendition of the ‘Floral Dance,’ this time joined by the ladies (Sarah Owen, Alison Kirby, Barbie Miller and Tracy Hulme.) Including Pike’s mother (Becki Oliver) which again was very funny.  Once again Mainwaring clashed with Hodges over who should conduct the choir which, as he pointed out was made up of men from his platoon, got to wield the baton of power.  Mainwaring’s arrogance was evident even in the role as choir master insisting, they ‘watch his stick’ as he counted them in. To make the song more interesting, Mainwaring gives them all different lines to sing resulting in Pike’s misunderstanding that he should sing either girl/boy therefore singing both and throwing off the whole rhythm of the song, Jones’ singing out of time and Fraser adding an extra ‘yay’ at the end of his line.  

Then, we were treated to a ‘War Time Revue’ featuring the ladies, who sang a medley of War Time Favourites introduced by Private Walker, including ‘Lili Marlene’ and ‘Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy’ while the cast stayed wonderfully in character behind them.  I even spotted the sneaky handing around of a hip flask of scotch concealed behind their music scores!  There were some excellent harmonies from the ‘Andrex Sisters’ (Sarah Owen, Barbie Miller and Tracy Hulme) and a beautifully poignant ‘Keep The Home Fires Burning’ featuring the moving echo of marching feet.  The show finished with a rousing audience participation sing song, led by the cast.

The set was simple with a window outline covered with tape as would be appropriate in a war time situation, war time posters on the walls and a map.  There was also a table with a black vintage style telephone used in the office area.  I liked the use of split scenes for the telephone scene between Colonel Pritchard and Mainwaring and for the Hodges hostage scene. Costumes were authentic khaki uniforms featuring small details such as badges and stripes.  The U-Boat Captain wore a white woolly jumper and naval uniform and the verger a long black cassock and flat cap.  I also loved the ladies 40s style dresses and hair styles. Props were appropriate to the war time theme with realistic guns and grenades.   Unfortunately, there were a couple of technical hitches with microphones, but this did not distract from the overall enjoyment of the show. 

I am happy to confirm, however, that the programme meets all the necessary criteria for inclusion in the 2025 poster and programme competition. 

Thank you for the warm welcome and chance to chat to Director Tracy and the back-stage crew after the show.  Also, the opportunity to meet the cast afterwards, especially Bill Lawrence, the very embodiment of the show must go on!

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